When forgiving is not easy
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Some think that it is an impossible thing to forgive all those who have hurt or injured them. There are threee main reasons why we may find it difficult to forgive:

First, we do not have a sufficiently deep realization of how much we ourselves have been forgiven. The sin of another against us is as nothing when compared to our sin against God-Yet He is willing to forgive and has forgiven those who come to Him in repentance, asking His forgiveness.

Second, holding resentment or indignation against another who has hurt us gives us a sense of power and control over them, and when we give it up, we are left feeling somewhat helpless. But it is to helplesssness we are called in the words: "It is mine to avenge, I will repay, says the Lord" (Romans 12: 19). Forgiveness involves giving up control and trusting God with the outcome.

A third reason why we may find it hard to forgive is what we might call "misplaced dependency". This occurs when we erroneously believe that another person's positive interaction with us is essential to us feeling good about ourselves, and so we move from dependency on God to dependency on others. Then when they hurt us, because we believe we need them to function, we feel they have destroyed our souls. This is why we are always hurt most by those who are closest to us. But people can not destroy us; only God can do that (Matthew 10: 28). It is a lot easier to forgive when we see that our life is not in people, but in God.

Forgiveness, we must remember, is not so much a feeling but a decision-an action of the will. You decide to forgive, whether you feel like it or not. You supply the willingness, God will supply the power. Be encouraged.

"O Father, give me a deeper realization than ever before of how much I have been forgiven. And forgive me again for preferring control over trust, and finding my life in people rather than in You. You have forgiven me. Help me to forgive others. In Jesus' Name. Amen."

Scriptures on which to reflect:

1. Consider the extent of divine forgiveness: Psalm 103: 12.

2.God-the only avenger of evil: Romans 12: 19.

3.What God has done for us we must do for others: Colossians 3: 13.

4. Unforgiveness ruins our lives: Hebrews 12: 15.

5. Forgiveness-the main message of the Bible: 2 Corinthians 12: 19.

6. Satan is unable to get a foothold among the forgiving: 2 Corinthians 1: 10-11.

7.Our refusal to forgive others impedes God's forgiveness of us: Mark 11: 25.

8. Serious consequences follow when we refuse to forgive: Matthew 18: 35.

***********************Letter# 21 (10.6.2000)******************